Taking Control: How to Manage Finances After Losing a Spouse
The death of a spouse is a profound loss, often leaving the surviving partner to manage finances alone. For one hypothetical couple—“Nancy” and “James,” married for over 50 years—this became a reality after James passed away. Like many couples, they had divided responsibilities: Nancy managed the household, planned meals, organized family trips, and thoughtfully chose gifts for their children and grandchildren. James took care of the yard and served as the family’s chief financial officer—paying bills, managing investments, and ensuring there was cash for vacations or home projects.
After James’ death, Nancy faced not only deep grief but also overwhelming uncertainty. Could she afford to stay in their home? Continue the annual beach trip with the family? Access the money she needed for everyday expenses?
Nancy’s estate attorney and financial advisor helped to guide her financial wellness, and here’s how professional support helped her take control.
1. Gather All Financial Information
Nancy’s financial advisor took the lead in organizing her financial situation. Together, they reviewed James’ files, including checking, savings, IRA, and brokerage account statements. The advisor also contacted their CPA to obtain the previous year’s tax return, ensuring they didn’t overlook any accounts or income sources, such as Nancy’s Social Security, James’ pension survivor benefit, or IRA distributions. They also reviewed bank and credit card statements to estimate Nancy’s annual expenses to help identify that her mortgage-free home meant she had no outstanding debts.
Why It Matters: A clear understanding of assets, income, and expenses can help ease fears about affordability, just like Nancy’s worry about keeping her home.
Actionable Tip: If records are incomplete, ask your financial advisor to check safe deposit boxes or digital accounts. Tax returns can help uncover hidden accounts or income.
Losing a Spouse Guidebook
Losing a spouse isn’t just an emotional upheaval; it can also lead to significant financial changes. Our guidebook is tailored to address common challenges and offer valuable insights.
2. Update Accounts and Simplify
Her financial advisor helped guide Nancy through the account paperwork. As the beneficiary of James’ IRA, she transferred the account into her name and updated the beneficiaries to her children. The financial advisor also recommended consolidating several smaller brokerage accounts into a single account, managing the necessary forms, and explaining how this would simplify account tracking.
Why It Matters: Keeping your accounts updated helps ensure your assets remain accessible and aligned with your wishes. Consolidating them saves time and provides a clearer picture of your overall wealth.
Actionable Tip: Rely on your financial advisor to help ensure transfers are handled accurately, and double-check beneficiary information to avoid future complications.
3. Project Income and Expenses
Nancy’s financial advisor helped create detailed projections, combining income from Social Security, her pension, and IRA distributions with her expenses. The advisor explained how Nancy could remain in her home and still afford the beach trip, likely using funds from her brokerage account to cover any additional cash needs. The financial professional modeled future scenarios, including the possibility of long-term care. Since Nancy and James had opted out of insurance due to its high cost, the advisor helped demonstrate that she may be able to afford two years of in-home care—her option—or, if she needed care for a longer period, move to a community that balanced cost and comfort.
Why It Matters: Projections can help you maintain your current lifestyle and prepare for future expenses by guiding cash flow for traditions like family trips.
Actionable Tip: Ask your financial professional to use conservative estimates and explain scenarios in simple terms, tailored to your priorities.
4. Align Investments With Your Comfort
Nancy was concerned about the fluctuations in her portfolio, which James’ bold investment choices largely influenced. Her advisor reviewed the portfolio and recommended shifting toward more bonds for stability, as they generally fluctuate less than stocks. The advisor carefully explained the changes to Nancy, making sure she understood and avoided unnecessary risk.
Why It Matters: A portfolio that aligns with your comfort level helps reduce stress, protect your savings, and support predictable cash flow.
Actionable Tip: Ask your advisor to clearly explain the investment options, focusing on what aligns with your goals and helps you pursue peace of mind.
5. Revise Legal Documents
Nancy’s financial advisor worked with her attorney to update her will, power of attorney, and healthcare directive. With James no longer serving as her decision-maker, the advisor encouraged Nancy to select trusted advocates. After careful consideration, she named her daughter as her personal representative and power of attorney agent and her sister, who is a nurse, as her healthcare decision-maker, ensuring she respects Nancy’s wishes.
Why It Matters: Updated documents protect your finances and health preferences, helping to ensure your legacy is secure if you are unable to make decisions.
Actionable Tip: Ask your advisor to connect you with an estate attorney and review your documents every few years or after any major changes.
6. Pace Yourself With Support
Nancy’s journey unfolded over months, not days. Her advisor focused on urgent tasks, such as account transfers and expense planning, while postponing less immediate tasks, like detailed investment adjustments. Regular meetings help foster trust. Her advisor’s dedication to checking in to help ease Nancy’s worries and celebrate her progress. This approach allowed Nancy the time and space to grieve while gradually gaining confidence as her own financial leader.
Why It Matters: Creating space between your decisions respects your emotional needs, helping to prevent overwhelm and support steady progress.
Actionable Tip: Consider choosing a fiduciary advisor—someone legally obligated to act in your best interest—to help you set priorities. Use a shared checklist to track tasks and stay organized without added stress.
Nancy’s Transformation
With the steady guidance of a financial advisor, we believe Nancy found answers to her deepest concerns—staying in her home, funding family trips, and accessing cash—through clear steps and collaborative planning. Though grief remains, she can feel empowered as her own chief financial officer, confidently facing her future.
If you’re navigating this transition, don’t go it alone. Start with one small step—find a statement or call an advisor. If you’re looking for a financial advisor, look for a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® who has passed a rigorous examination, completed a specific education program, and met experience requirements, all while adhering to high ethical standards. CFP professionals are held to a fiduciary duty, meaning they must act in their clients’ best interests.
The above is a hypothetical scenario-not involving an actual Savant client. The story presented is fictitious and intended for illustrative purposes only and should not be construed as a guarantee of future results. It does not represent the experiences of any actual client or person. Please consult your financial professional regarding your unique situation.
Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Center for Financial Planning, Inc. owns and licenses the certification marks CFP®, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER®, and CFP® (with plaque design) in the United States to Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards, Inc., which authorizes individuals who successfully complete the organization’s initial and ongoing certification requirements to use the certification marks.
Patti B. Black
Financial Advisor
CFP®, CSA®